So in last month’s Steel Side we covered how to make a metal band in 6 easy steps. I’m still waiting to hear from the thousands of people that followed the steps and now have successful, about to be signed bands. I know they are just so overly busy with their new found stardom that it’s taking a while to get their emails to me, but I’m sure they will be flooding my inbox any day now (picturing them coming in so fast I get a “You’ve Got Mail” remix. You….you’ve got……you’ve got mail). While I’m awaiting all that wonderful correspondence, I’m gonna let you all in on a secret, just in case no one has mentioned it to you, and you haven’t come to this conclusion on your own. IT’S HOT. Just thought y’all might wanna know that. So now you assume that I’m gonna write about snowballs, ice cream, the North Pole (which maybe I should cause cooling off is the theme for Shockwave’s next event, Snoballs in Summer at Sinix on August 6th) but nah, this  month I’m gonna write about something near and dear to my heart. Yup, you guessed it, groupies. It’s high time someone gave a history of the time honored tradition of f@#cking rock stars, just cause they’re rock stars.

You go to a great show, and as you’re leaving you are still rockin’ out in your head. Walkin thru the parkin lot to your car, thinkin how much fun you just had, your mind wanders and you start daydreaming (is it still day dreaming if the sun’s not out and it’s nighttime?) about how cool it would be to rock for a living. You happen to see a couple of band members with a crowd around them, getting high fives, poundin the rock, and autographing a fantastic set of boobies. Lucky bastards, you think. Well stop wishing you had a band that kicks ass and do it. I know what you’re thinkin, “But Justus, I don’t even know where to start.” Well that’s what I’m here for. I’m gonna tell you how to make a metal band in 6 easy steps.

Shows, shows and more shows. That’s what happens when the weather gets nice. Shows come out of the woodwork, and I feel like I’ve been out more in the past four days then I did through all of winter. It’s a good thing. As much as I hate the heat, bring on the summer concerts.

The first thing that was on my schedule was Shockwave Magazine’s Second Annual Rocker Chick Contest. There is a separate review of it, so if you missed it, smack your knuckles with a ruler, shame on you, and I’ll leave it at that. Totally by accident, when I went to look up the website to see where the Rocker Chick contest was, I found that playing the night before at the same venue was a Pearl Jam cover band called Yield. They were listed as Maryland’s premiere Pearl Jam cover band. So I said what the hell, I liked Pearl Jam a lot back when, for five bucks why not go check them out. I got to Sinix

You hear a song on the radio. It's loud. It's rocking. The singer is speaking of a painful situation you're sure you can relate to. You buy the album. It's awesome. Full of songs that make you feel. It's heavy, and melodic. Time goes by. Your new favorite band puts out a new album and you can't wait to get it. The day finally arrives. You press play. And while it doesn't totally suck (at least you are trying to convince yourself of that fact), it just doesn't have that same edgy, heavy, pained-up sound. I feel like this happens over and over again. And so I ponder. Is it that the band had a bunch of years of writing and playing to make a great first album, and then tried to write a whole new one in a year? Is it the powers that be at the label pushing them toward a more popular sound? Is the band just rich and famous and happy now? While all of these might be contributing factors, I think it's mostly